suspension

i met jess today
the one whose shift i covered.
man what a douche.
oh well she is new after all.

ahh val.
so glad she didnt see me.
fucking freaky lady.

ive eaten about 5 tictacs today
like whole packets.

i really wanted to cry so fucking much today but i went for a long walk to blacktown which sort of made me feel better.
and despite that i am having such a shit time, when it started to pour rain while i was walking (i had am umbrella just in case) i could not stop smiling.
it was that smile like 'im such a douche'.
the happiest part of my day was walking in the rain with wet jeans and chucks, freezing and realising how shit my life is at the moment and not caring just for a few minutes.

peaceout !
-dyz_./

despite the hate in this blog, i love the state library.

I hate this place.

I detest this place so much I just want to take each individual part that forms it and rip it to tiny shreds.

I hate being put here.

I hate that I am stuck here.

I hate that I have a brother who seems to kick my fucking arse at every shitty thing.
I hate that he seems to think we are a competitive family.
I hate that I really know we are.
I hate that hes better than me at everything and it must be fucking amazing because he has six legs to rub step on my face while he doing it.

I hate that everyone uses me as a freaking cat scratch pole.
Scratching just to see who can rip me up first.
As much as I want to do a degree that make me the fucking tissues in a situation of distress or the stress ball when someone is feeling angry, I do not want to be that yet.

Yer, I love helping people.
But who in the fucking world helps me?
Do you?

I've been crying quite a fucking loat lately.
Nights of awesome days sink under empty tissue boxes.
I hate crying.
I hated it then and I hate it now.

But its a better way to let petty feelings...

I can't do my weekly walks anymore.
I hate having no time to think.

I hate when people make me worry about shit I don't really need to.
Do you fucking think I need anymore problems to weigh me down?

Try living in my house where all I get is shit from the Parental Units and a brother who seems like God's miracle to the fucking world.

People suck.
I lost most of my faith in people quite a while ago.

The whole Mikkey and Andii thing was fucked.
Fucking fucked from the fucking beginning.

I don't really care much for anything anymore.
I can't write, I don't read as much as I used to, I can't draw and I don't dA.
FUCKING PIECE OF USELESS SHIT.

Yer.
Don't expect to hear much of me for a few days.
I'll just be lying home in bed, staring at my ceiling, finding new ways to get grounded so I don't have to lie to you and tell you that I just don't wanna see you.

Hey I better go.
Or I won't wake up tomorrow in time for work.

Truth be told.
Right now, I don't feel like waking up.

You know, I really could have used two of the most important people to me tonight.
But it seems that everyone is enjoying life.

God, I hope Dana doesn't read this.

I fucking love you Dana.
Don't read this until after your birthday.
I don't to be like Harriet and upstage you or anything.

FUCK !
Just fuck.

Yer.
I don't think you'll see writing in my blog for days unless something just happens that I need to let out.
God knows I don't talk to people about this shit.
Whats the point of getting them down too?

Peace out.
- Dyanne.

by the way.
to someone i wont mention
go get fucked.
im sick of your fucking shit
omfg wah wah wah
go fucking bother someone else.

Gangsters Paradise.

'Liebe'.
I won't lost this one !
I lost freaking last bet by accident.
Fucking Peter.
He was GOING to, so very close to asking Jilly, but I just HAD to turn around and ask Jilly something.
Gah.
I won't lost this time.
I am determined not to lose.

Wow.
In that 'Would I Lie To You' song by Charles and Eddie...
Damn his voice is like the Beegees.

Anyways.
Yer that religion thingy.
Lectio Divina...
Hahahah
"Walk through the valley of the shadow of death"
How to remember Psalm 23...

I've had Gangsters Paradise stuck in my head all weekend.
GUUHHH...

I feel semi-gangster.
Its digusting.


I feel like watching Boondocks.
Not like that will help...
Ahhhh, but I havent seen all of Season 2 yet.
And who doesn't wanna see Riley get beat up by Huey?
LOL

PEACEOUT !
-dyz_./

by the way
I AM NOT GOING OUT WITH JOSH.
ahhahha

lol. just lol.

Damn...
I can't even say it here because you guys read this.

But it is hilarious.
And I wanna see what people say.

LOL.
We're cool (:


Peace out !
-dyz_./

ps/ totally freaking sick.
like cough up a lung sick.
i need a hug but someone who can with stand a boa constrictor hug cos i need to cling to something so that "the walls stay where they are suposed to".
Dana, if you don't get that....
I'd be very ashamed
LOL
<3

falstaffsucks.

While we're in our state of rememberance of SC...
LOL

For science...omfg
That was funny as.
Lana kept drinking ittttt.
LOLOL
I could have gotten kicked out for that.
LOL

Man I'm badass.

DARNA!
One/ I didn't sabotage you.
Two/ Even if i did, like it would work smrtfgt.
Three/ It wasn't even that big a sip.
Four/ You weren't really all that sick.
Five/ Your fualt for not eating something before the consumption of disguised alcohol.
Six/ "WTF! IS THIS SOME KIND OF BLEACH SHIT?"
ROFLLLLLLLLLLLLLL

Seven/ Man you were hilarious.

Ahhhhhh....
That idiot from Marist...
Trying to collapse the table.

And the timed coughing LOLOLOLOL

Ahhhhhh our school is funny.

Good times.
I miss them...

Joel blocked me.
What nice friends I has. (:


Gahhhrr at the sheep in Photography.
Just want to shear them.
Whats with the animal thing tonight?

Wow, its only a quarter to 11.....
I'm giving up on English.

Falstaff you dispicable character.


PEACE OUT!
-dyz_./

whatevs.

GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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I'm so glad for the bass in my speakers.
I can feel it half way across my room.
Drowning out stupid shitty day with (Bee)n Stalking Jaque.

Dear Dana,
Get over it.
But its always nice to know that you'd prefer freaky stalking Christina over me.
Have fun.

Dear group,
Go fuck yourselves.
You're so unobservant right up until it hits breaking point.
With friends like us, why do we need the government?
We end up screwing it up by ourselves.

Dear Lorraine,
Sorry.

Political shit...joy.
You're perfect for each other Deeh.
Go have your little DBSK Babies.

Know what?
You can all get fucked.

Way to ruin one of the best days in the world.